Are Your Friends Pulling You Down?



Your friend is a co architect of your life as you. Whatever you wish to achieve in life can be predicted from the caliber of those around you. Let’s do a little mathematics; everybody you see around you can be measured in terms of their energy level. The highly successful people are usually highly marked up in energy level while pessimist mostly carry very low or negative quantum of energy.

Imagine you have a caucus of 4 friends on campus: Musa, Sewa, Emeka and Bose. The four of your somehow relate around one another and can be terms a group of friends. If Musa is highly optimistic, motivated and with a drive to succeed (let’s say energy level 9); Sewa sees impossibilities in most things and skeptical of everyone around (energy level 2); Emeka is very enterprising but paranoid (energy level 5) and Bose is gullible but positive (energy level 4). These four friends roll together because they study similar course in school.

In the long run, all the energy level of the four will average themselves: they would all most likely drop or rise to an average of energy level 5. That is a huge drop for Musa and stagnation for Emeka. As we gear up to resume school, we need to reconnect with friends who will help us grow, develop and improve. This simple formula is the reason the rich prefer to flock with the rich ( to maintain high energy) and the poor continues to roam around his or her fellow folks.

Be fair to yourself and list those achievements you desire( want to maintain a 4 point CGPA, want to excel in that sport, want to grow your business idea on campus). Your first job is to find people who already are there and tap into them. To gain a CGPA of 4 points, you can’t achieve that by rolling with students who don’t make conscious effort to move from 2 points to 3 points. Students who think no matter what you do you can’t pass a certain course; students who believe EVERYTHING is not on merit shouldn’t be your core friends.

Develop new set of energy and success by developing sets of friends who can help you advance. Success is in the mind and your mind is your open slate; you can design the unbelievable in it( and then achieve it). As a student Engineering of Abubakar Tafawa Balewa University Bauchi, I decided to connect last semester with students I believe were better than me. There was a little hesitation at first because even though we were course colleagues, I later realized they maintained me on the level of FFF( Friend For Fun). When they seek to relax and play more, I was the typical type of fellow they would call and sit among. We would gist, discuss football and babes and it ended there. When I decided to put up a more serious phase, it was abysmal to them.

I ‘forced’ myself into their friendship again on a SERIOUS level. Then I discovered the secret, they did way more than I used to see. These friends of mine had a way of going extra mile on more research, engaged successful higher level students( for tutoring and materials)  and spend most of the nights awake. These materials I would discover were not actually being hoarded, they shared it amongst themselves but only among similar minds. The tremendous gain had reflected in my way of thinking and am glad I had tapped into a higher energy from a different set of friend.

Drag your friends up; If they don’t want to move up, MOVE AHEAD


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here